You can turn your life around

its-a-good-day-to-turn-your-life-around

To be satisfied with life, you need to change and adapt to changes. The good news? No one can do it for you but you. The first step is always the hardest, but with determination and the right mindset you can overcome just about anything. If you’ve had enough of how things are right now, what lies around the corner can (and will) be completely different.

bepatient

Be Patient

Remember your current circumstance did not manifest overnight. There are years of thoughts feelings and actions behind what has been in place in your life, so be patient as you work to turn it all around.

Be inspired by others

Reading stories by other people who have turned their life around through hard work talent grit and good choices encourages us to realise that it’s possible to overcome just about anything, from parents passing away, to extreme poverty, and more

womaninprogress

Oprah Winfrey turned a life of hardship into inspiration for a multi-billion-dollar empire

Oprah spent the first six years of her life living with her grandmother wearing dresses made out of potato sacks. After being molested by two members of her family and a family friend, she ran away from home at age 13. At 14, her newborn child died shortly after he was born. She went back to live with her mother, but it wasn’t until her mother sent her to live with her father that she turned her life around.

She got a full scholarship to college, won a beauty pageant —where she was discovered by a radio station — and the rest is history. The Oprah name became an empire, and according to Forbes she is worth $2.7 billion.

Do-Won-Chang-

Do Won Chang worked three jobs to make ends meet before starting Forever 21

Do Won Chang and his wife, Jin Sook, moved to America from Korea in 1981. When they first arrived, Do Won was forced to work three jobs at the same time to support them, as a janitor, a gas station attendant, and in a coffee shop. Eventually, they were able to open their first clothing store in 1984.

That one store grew into Forever 21, which pioneered fast fashion and is now a multi-national, 480 store empire that generates around $3 billion in sales a year. It’s a family business, with the couple’s daughters Linda and Esther helping to run the company.

overtoyou

Start your day with good vibes

goodvibes

 

Start your day with good vibes

 

Don’t rush in the morning

Their was a time in my life, when I used to get so stressed in the morning, trying to get my children ready for school, sort myself out, my housework as well as trying to develop my business. I am so relieved that they are now at an age when they can get themselves ready without my help. I have over the years leant to have a simple morning routine to fuel my day with positive vibes

metime

What I do each morning

I make sure on most days that I go to bed early enough so that I can wake up early.   I wake up at 5am  each day except weekends when I reward myself by not waking up till 8am. For me this 2 hour each morning is my “me time” when I wake up and do everything I need to do to start my day in a positive mood.

I really enjoy the quietness of the morning, as it gives me time to pray, mediate, I spend time writing down about people, experiences and things that I am grateful for and appreciate in my life right now, I then look at my diary and focus on the things I have to do for the day, and spend some time daydream about how may day will go. I finish off with my fun song “ Wake up and feel happy boom boom” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQPhLEWmTvo

You can do this too!

Once you get into the habit of having a quiet and relaxed start to your day, you will never want to go back to the “race to make it on time” lifestyle.

Tip

One great way to set the right tone for a day you can look forward to (or at least enjoy or appreciate — despite the piles of work or messy house or complicated relationship you may be facing), is to make enough time when you wake up to do what you personally need to do to start your day off right..

Do let me know how you get and let me know what your morning routine is.

One Minute Smilence

During the day, remember to take a minute at various times to just think happy thoughts and smile for a minute. Smile because you are alive, Smile because no matter what you are going through their is always a reason to smile,

 

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 21 (Congratulations)

congratulationsThe 21 Days sadness diet© Day 21 Congratulations

Hello again, and welcome the final day of our 21 Days Diet, and I am so grateful and thankful that you have been part of it.

So right now, what colour is your happiness level?

sadness

Please let me know by commenting on this blog how this sadness diet© has helped you and any comment or suggestions you may have to help me improve it.

RECAP ON SOME OF THE KEY POINTS

IGROWS

The idea of The sadness diet© is for us to look at the things that make us sad, and together find ways to help us feel happier and have a reason to wake up each day with a smile. So on this journey, I have tried to Support, Motivate, Inspire, Love, and Encourage you.

The method I used to help us look at ways of being happier is the part of a coaching model “IGROWS” which I learnt as part of my Life Coaching course with the Coaching Academey .“IGROWS” mean (Issue, Goals, Reality, Options, Willingness and Smiles.

facts of smiling

Tips to cope when you feel a bit sad

Acknowledge that you are sad – because life is full of challenges and its ok to be sad

Express your feelings of sadness – It is important that you express how you feel as it is all part of the journey towards happiness. So cry, scream etc it’s ok ( this too will pass away) and be patient that in time you will feel happier again.

You could also have a sadness party https://confidentqueen.wordpress.com/2014/07/30/sadness-party/

If you are really feeling deeply sad or depressed, remember you are not alone, and if you feel like talking to someone there is the Samaritans, Mind, NHS Choices and similar organizations that can help you.

Before you go to bed each night just focus on things you are grateful for, think happy thoughts, play happy music so that you can go to bed feeling good and enjoying a good night’s sleep. ( See below on how to add the instant feel good factor to your day).

When you wake up each morning, take a deep breath, focus on grateful for, think happy thoughts, play happy music so that you can start your day with a smile and in a good mood. ( See below on how to add the instant feel good factor to your day)

visualise

Next Steps

Over the next few days, I want you to develop daily habits that will help you to cope with life’s unexpected events that make you sad. Refer back to the 21 days diet and decide which activities work best for you. Below is a suggestion of things you can do each day when you wake up, during the Day and before going to bed.

Instant Feel Good Factor

Find a quiet place

Sit down

Breathe in slowly and Breathe out Slowly ( do this a couple of times)

Breathe in slowly and then laugh out loud slowly (do this a couple of times)

Say – I am so grateful and happy to be alive to see another day.

Think and focus on something that makes you feel happy or just make sing and dance to my favourite “wake up I feel happy boom, boom, I feel like dancing around boom boom, and now I am dancing line no one’s watching boom, boom” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQPhLEWmTvo

Smile – Just spend a few seconds smiling, and then I want you to give out a couple of big laughs (hahaha) and say (woohoo boom boom)

Get your Gift of a smile box, and make use of the items as you continue to feel good and smile,

Now give yourself a big hug them go and share a smile and a hug with someone else!

hug2

SUMMARY OF THE LAST 21 DAYS

Over the last 21 Days, we have covered the following topics and if you do need the whole 21 days I can send you in my Ebook which I am creating for £7. I also offer one to one coaching session to help you in your journey to your happier life and this is £27 per session which can be via skype, telephone, and emails. Face to Face meetings will be charged at a higher rate to cover travel time and costs. I am based in Gravesend Kent (UK)

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 1 Issue

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 2 Goals

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 3 Goals – Vision Boards

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 4 Affirmations

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 5 Celebrate our progress so far

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 6 Don’t be weighed down by your problems

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 7 The Gift of a Smile Box

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 8 Options

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 9 I am willing to change

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 10 Don’t be discouraged

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 11 Make the most of your time

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 12 You are never too old

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 13 Six Ways to Wellbeing

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 14 Meditation by – Liz Almond

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 15 Mindfulness from Action for Happiness

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 16 It’s good to hug

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 18 Bury your regrets

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 19 Time to Review and Reflect

The 21 Days Sadness diet© Day 20 Law of Attraction

The 21 Days Sadness diet© Day 21 Congratulations

willingtochange

The sadness diet© Day 19 ( Time to Review and Reflect)

relect2

The sadness diet©

The idea of The sadness diet© is for us to look at the things that make us sad, and together find ways to help us feel happier and have a reason to wake up each day with a smile. So on this journey, we will all Support, Motivate, Inspire, Love, and Encourage each other. Method we will use is called “IGROWS” turn our sadness into Joy. (Issue, Goals, Reality, Options, Willingness and Smiles

I am excited!

I am feeling so excited that I have managed to keep on writing about the sadness diet, and I am grateful for all the wonderful comments and feedback that you have given me. Over the last 18 days, we all must have had some unexpected news or situation, that stopped us on our track and seemed to mess up our well laid plans.   In those moments, we may have cried, felt disappointed and frustrated, but in time, we got over it, and still carry on with our lives realising that sadness is temporary and it’s all part of life. We realise that their have also been opportunities and situations that made us stop and say “…..despite it all, but still I smile!

 refelecct1

Time to review and reflect

Today, we will take time to review your progress so far as well as time for you to catch up on any of the day’s activity you may have missed,

Activity 1 – go through all the different articles I have brought to you as part of this 21 days sadness diet and pick up the key things that matter to you.

Activity 2 –   Come up with ways you can incorporate some of the ideas into your daily lifestyle e.g One of the things I do each day is to meditate at least 10 minutes in the morning and before I go to sleep.

Activity 3 – What things will you take on board to help you at moments when you feel sad? E.g I keep my box of smiles in my bag daily so that at moment when I feel sad and I find a quite place to reflect on the items in it.

Activity 3 – What are you grateful for?

Grateful

Just take a moment to write down all the people, things, situations that you are grateful for right now? e.g for me I am so grateful, thankful and happy that I have been able to secure part time contracts which will now allow me to have regular monthly income each month.

Take care and see you tomorrow when we will look at the Law of Attraction.

thoughtsbecomethings

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 18 (Bury your regrets)

neverregret

Welcome back

Thank you so much for joining in our Sadness Diet and the journey to happier times.   In everyday life, we realise that there is a time for every purpose under heaven, their will be times when we feel sad and times when we feel happy. Yesterday we used the resources from ( http://www.positivityblog.com/index.php/2014/03/05/grateful-when-times-are-tough/) and we focused on how to be grateful even when we feel sad.

Why we regret things at times

One of the biggest cause of sadness for a lot of us is “regret” when things are not going according to plan, and we have too much time to think, we can sometime fall into depression and sadness as we start focussing of regret using “If only”

Regret happens when you don’t forgive yourself. When your mistake feels final, like going too fast on a motorway, it is too easy to feel regret. However, forgiveness is a powerful catalyst, and is one of the most loving actions you can take for yourself. While regret holds you back in the past, forgiveness helps you to move forward.

Tell yourself, “That was part of who I was then. I didn’t know any better or I would have made a different choice. That mistake helped me to grow into who I am today. I forgive myself and resolve to move forward.” Believe what you tell yourself.

regrets of the dying

The day I was feeling so sad

A while back ago, I was feeling a bit sad and this was triggered by the fact that I had problems with my sink, and I needed to get a plumber out but right at that point I did not have the money to get a plumber in, and at the same time my son could not go to a particular event he had been invited to as their was no one to take him and I had to give up my car two years ago whilst I sorted my temporary financial set back.

But this day, as I sat down at home on my own, I really felt sad, and started to focus on the fact that I did not have regular contract, I wished I had not got myself in so much debt, I regretted the fact that my life was not going how I had expected it – get married, have children, enjoy wonderful family live, retire early and travel round the world! I really felt so sad and started to cry, but in the midst of it all, a friend of mine called and was a bit upset and I spent time talking to her and cheering her up. After speaking to her, I forgot I was sad, and just got up and started to do things to stop me from focussing on my past regrets. Out of all this, I decided to write this 21 days sadness diet, as a way of helping me to cope and also to share my experiences with you.

 

Tips on coping with regret

  1.  Let go of the past, and create a better future. When you do this, there is no longer room for regret, for it serves no active purpose.
  2. Concentrate on now. Put your passion into a new relationship, a new skill or a new adventure.
  3. Forgive yourself, learn from your mistakes, and move forward with a clear conscience.
  4. Let Go of Negative Feelings and send negative feelings about your actions into the past, where the action occurred. They don’t do you any good now.
  5. Focus on new accomplishments and connections so you can move forward, away from memories, which no longer serve you.
  6. Find the Lessons – Ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” When you make a mistake, there is ALWAYS something to learn. Learning equals growth. It is more difficult to feel loss when your focus is on gain, and on bettering yourself.

Activity – How Bury your regret

  1. Get a piece of paper and write down all the things you regret and why you regret it.
  2. Cross a line against each one as a way of reminding yourself , that it is the past, it is gone and there is nothing you can do to change it.
  3. Forgive yourself, as sometimes we make choices which at the time seem to be good, but on later reflection we realise it was not a good choice.
  4. Try and learn the lessons you gained from it
  5. Now cut the paper up in small pieces
  6. You then need to find a spot in an open space – lets say if you have a back garden, dig a whole and bury the small pieces, or if you have a shredder you can shred it, or safely you could burn the paper – it is a way of letting go
  7. Now take a deep breath and focus on what you can do right now to change your situation – if you find you cannot cope with doing this, do ask for help or you can email me genny@confidentqueen.co.uk

How to make amends with others

If you regret something you have done to someone, then you should try and ask for forgiveness from that person and if they don’t accept your forgives, its ok as you have done your part and they may not be at a place yet where they can forgive you.

Some times it is difficult if the person has died but you can still. My dad died 29 years ago, and I really regret the fact that when I was younger he promised to buy me a white pair of shoes, and he never had the chance to. This affected me for years, but one day I remember waking up crying and saying “ Dad I love you, now you are gone I know you can’t buy me my shoes, but it’s ok now and I forgive you”

Credits and useful links :-

http://thinksimplenow.com/wisdom/how-to-deal-with-regret/

http://www.actionforhappiness.org/10-keys-to-happier-living/find-ways-to-bounce-back/details

Please feel free to email or comment on this blog, which I hope has helped you to cope with some of the regrets you may have. May the Smile be with you.

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 17 (Be Grateful even when you feel sad)

Grateful

Welcome back

Thank you so much for joining in our Sadness Diet and the journey to happier times.  In everyday life, we realise that there is a time for every purpose under heaven, their will be times when we feel sad and times when we feel happy. Yesterday we used the resources from http://www.mindbodygreen.com and looked at why its good to enjoy a hug. I hope you managed to hug yourself and shared hugs with others/

Today we look at – Being Grateful even when you are feeling sad

Some days we wake up feeling excited and passionate about life and things are just great. We then have days when we do not feel much motivated at all. When our best laid plans go out the window before the day has barely begun; or when something important unexpectedly goes wrong and we get that sinking feeling our your stomach. Or when you feel sorry for yourself and honestly just want to go back to bed and to sleep again. The old saying tells us to count our blessings, but sometimes that can be difficult to do.

Maybe the simplest and certainly one of the most effective ways to turn such a day, week or month around into something more positive and better is in my experience to turn your focus to gratitude. Because even if things look tough today or for the next 3 or 6 months we can always find something or several things to feel very grateful for about our life. ( http://www.positivityblog.com/index.php/2014/03/05/grateful-when-times-are-tough/)

When you are grateful…….…

Have more energy and optimism

Are less bothered by life’s hassles

Are more resilient in the face of stress

Are healthier

Suffer less depression than the rest of us

Are more compassionate

Are more likely to help others

Are less materialistic

Are more satisfied with life.

9 Benefits of Being Grateful

Some of the things I am grateful for right now in my life

  1. I am alive and in good health
  2. I have wonderful children, family, church  members and a network of fantastic friends
  3. A roof over our heads and a warm, loving and secure home
  4. Plenty of drinkable water when there are so many in the world with no access to clean water
  5. I have more than enough food to eat and to share with others
  6. Regular contract work
  7. I can enjoy the small and free pleasures of life.
  8. Access to the internet which has allowed me to learn so much and make so many new friends
  9. Being able to be happy and share happiness to others
  10. The setbacks that have formed me and made me stronger
  11. Great memories of my family and friends who are no longer with us

 

Activity 1 – So now you need to sit down and just take a few minutes to write down all the things that you are grateful for in your life right now. Take your time and each day just keep writing, for me it is therapy and I love going back and reading my gratitude list especially at times when I feel a bit down, it helps me to realise how blessed I truly am, especially in a world where so many are suffering and in need of the basics of life.

Thanks for taking part in the Sadness diet, and I am grateful that you have given me the opportunity to share with you.  No matter what you are going through give yourself permission to SMILE.

 

The 21 Days Sadness Diet© Day 15 (Mindfulness – from Action for Happiness)

actionforhappiness

Welcome back

Thank you so much for joining in our Sadness Diet and the journey to happier times.  In everyday life, we realise that there is a time for every purpose under heaven, their will be times when we feel sad and times when we feel happy. Yesterday thanks to Liz Arnold, we looked at how meditation can help calm us and change our mood.

Feedback from Yesterday

I hope after yesterday, you will try and include some mediation into your daily routine and make it a habit.

Today – Action of Happiness (http://www.actionforhappiness.org/)

On the same theme as yesterday, today we are going to look at mindfulness and how it can help us to get more from each day and I have taken the information from Action for Happiness which is an organisation I support and love as they are doing so much to help us all in our journey towards happiness,

 

Bring mindfulness into your day

Mindfulness is a key skill for happiness and we can do it wherever we are. So here are some ideas to get started – it’ll help you get more from your day!

 

Mindfulness

Being mindful means being more fully aware of what is around us – what we can see, hear, touch and taste. And what is happening inside – our thoughts and feelings. It’s about learning to observe all this but not getting caught up in thinking or worrying about it, so being able to choose what we then attend to.

Why do it?

In our busy lives we constantly have our head full or thoughts about the future or about the past – what are we going to do next or what are we going to become or how well or badly we just did. This means we’re often not that aware of what is around us, and what happening in the here and now. So there’s likely to be a lot good stuff that we miss (or not so good stuff that we really need to be aware of). It also means that we often do things more out of unconscious habit rather than fully conscious choice. Mindfulness has been shown to help us be healthier, less affected by stress, more relaxed, more creative, more open to learning, sleep better, improve our relationships with others and feel happier and more satisfied with our lives.

 

What’s great is it’s a skill that anyone can learn and benefit from. It is very simple, and need take only a few minutes a day. But it does take a bit of practice and it may be hard at first. Keep at it and you’ll feel the benefits in many areas of your life. There are various ways we can be mindful and I have selected to focus on how we can observe mindfully from he article from Action for Happiness (http://www.actionforhappiness.org/)

  1. Observing mindfully (Today’s activity)

This is about simply trying to increase what we’re aware of and our consciousness of what is around us. It only takes a few extra minutes. Here are some ideas to try:

As you enter your house or workplace, be aware of your sensations and feelings as you enter. How does the floor feel beneath your feet? What noises can you hear? What smells do you notice? What colours?

Each time you step outside look up at the sky and see the sky and the clouds or the stars, notice the feeling of the air on your body or the warmth of the sun or sensation of the wind.

Look up at some trees and notice how they are, their different shapes and colours. Look at the texture of their bark, branches and leaves. Notice how these move and the sound of the leaves. Are there any birds sitting in them or singing? Can you see sunlight through the foliage or drops of rain in the leaves? What insects are buzzing nearby? What else can you notice?

When you are going somewhere in the car, by foot or on your bike notice how you are as you travel. Are you rushing to reach your destination? How does it feel? Where are the muscles in your body tight or relaxed? Which are working and which are not? How does your breathing feel – fast, slow, deep or shallow? Does it feel different when you slow down and take your time?

Each day notice an object of wonder or beauty. Take a moment to appreciate the skill and effort that went into an object such as a car, building, sculpture or work of art or the beauty in nature.

When you are doing something pleasurable such as taking a warm shower or bath, petting you dog or cat, stroking your child’s hair or sitting down for a moment of peace, be really present. Really notice what it is you find pleasurable about the experience and how it makes you feel.

For more information :-

http://www.actionforhappiness.org/take-action/bring-mindfulness-into-your-day

 

 

 

Instant Feel Good

Sit down

Breathe in slowly and Breathe out Slowly ( do this a couple of times)

Breathe in slowly and then laugh out loud slowly (do this a couple of times)

Say – I am so grateful and happy to be alive to see another day.

Think and focus on something that makes you feel happy or just make sing and dance to my favourite “wake up I feel happy boom, boom, I feel like dancing around boom boom, and now I am dancing line no one’s watching boom, boom”

Smile – Just spend a few seconds smiling, and then I want you to give out a couple of big laughs (hahaha)

Get your Gift of a smile box, and make use of the items as you continue to feel good and smile

See you tomorrow and may the SMILE always be with you!

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 14 (Meditation by – Liz Almond)

meditate

Welcome back

Thank you so much for joining in our Sadness Diet and the journey to happier times.  In everyday life, we realise that there is a time for every purpose under heaven, their will be times when we feel sad and times when we feel happy. Today we are going to look at how mediation can help us change our mood from moments of sadness to moments of peace, calm and happiness.

Feedback from Yesterday

I hope yesterday you were inspired byte six ways to Wellbeing and started to make small changes in your life.

Today

One of the things I love to do each morning and night is to take time to meditate. This allows me to clear my mind and start and finish my day feeling refreshed and relaxed. Last year I was quite privileged to do a session with an amazing lady Liz, and she really helped me to sort out a few issues I had through meditation. So today I am happy she agreed for me to include her blog on meditation as I feel it will help us all in our journey towards a happier life.

 

Today’s Activity

Read the article below and try to schedule time for you to meditate and remember as always if you need help you can email me, and if its specific to mediation feel free to contact Liz directly on 07815 904848 or email liz@insightfulminds.co.uk

Over to Liz

Liz

 

 

http://insightfulminds.co.uk/can-meditating-bring-you-more-happiness-and-money/

 Can meditating bring you more happiness and money?

The answer in short is Yes!!!!!!!     I used to think that meditating was boring and I clearly remember telling a friend who did meditate this once. She looked puzzled, but did not question me as to why I thought this. I wish she had! Now years on… I understand as I am a very different person now to who I was then. For years I had been living a life of lots of stress and anxiety as I was in a high pressured job, I was reacting to life rather than choosing to lead the life I wanted and I always did what I was told and sabotaged my happiness as I thought other people around me – my work colleagues, my friends and my family were more important than me. Now that I understand that my happiness must come first, I have changed how I behave with the people around me. Now I am not saying that you shouldn’t help those around you as one of the qualities of being attractive to the Universe, is being selfless. The key is always to ask yourself, am I sabotaging my happiness? This is where meditating can help.

For anyone who has read any of the top ‘Get yourself Rich’ books, you will understand that all the top entrepreneurs/business owners meditate. Why do they do it? Because it allows them to be more effective in their decision making, they are more productive and they understand that their internal happiness affects their energy and love for life. Ultimately if you are not happy, you will put out a negative view to the world and this will affect you attracting in the work/happiness that you want. They also realise that money relates to Abundance. Meditating allows them to release negative thoughts about themselves and to ask their higher selves about how they can achieve the success that they are looking for. They understand that meditating will allow them to ask for opportunities, to gain ideas , to appreciate life and to achieve peace of mind which are all qualities of being abundant in life. All the top entrepreneurs/business owners meditate – Oprah Winfrey, Richard Branson, etc. If they can do it, you can too. They also understand that in the mind, Health, Wealth and Happiness is interlinked and they are tapping into their inner wisdom. If you are in business and you are not meditating. Start now… You can not afford not to …..

What is meditation?

Meditation comes in many forms and you may well have heard of Mindfulness Meditation, Transcendental Meditation, Kundalini, QiKong, Guided Visualisation, Trance based practices and Heart Rhythms Meditation. Basically they are techniques to quieten the mind and to allow you to be peaceful as in today’s society we live life at such a pace that our mind goes at a very fast pace and is full of thoughts which then makes us feel worse as we can get overwhelmed. Now generally you will be drawn to one particular type of meditation. If you can’t bear the thought of being cross legged and being sat in a yoga pose, then don’t worry because this is not mandatory!!! Regardless of the method you choose, the most important thing is to clear your mind and to meditate in questions or topics which are important to you. Now when I say this, I don’t mean that you close your eyes and think through all the tasks you need to do today. Think about a question you would like to ask yourself. For example, I sometimes ask myself, what do I need to learn today? Or I ask myself a specific question and then quieten my mind. By meditating, you are allowing yourself to connect with your Higher Self, a deeper wisdom inside of you, and you will find that with practice, you will gain more clarity and understanding. You also need to focus on your breath. Breath in through your mouth positivity (think positive thoughts) and breath out negativity (negative thoughts that come up for you) I tend to use different forms of meditation throughout the week, as I like the variety, but the choice is yours. The key is to make mediating a daily habit and to ingrain a new habit it takes 28 times of practicing, so don’t give up too soon! By focussing on what I do have rather than what I don’t have and by expressing gratitude, I gain ideas and clarity for my day.

The hidden benefits of mediating

By mediating, you are basically offloading negative thoughts and feelings from your body and your energy field – your aura. When we are stressed, we take on board other people’s stuff too which weighs us down and can make us feel sad and depressed. When you get used to doing it, you will feel lighter and brighter and happier which in turn will bring more positive situations to you as you will have more ideas, more inspiration and will see more opportunities around you. This is you being able to see abundance in your life rather than scarcity. Even in the darkest situation, you can see a hidden blessing. Something to be grateful for. Meditating helps you get in tune with the inner you. There is now research to suggest that weight loss and as well as a better sex life are also benefits from meditating regularly. By being a calmer and happier you, you are more in balance with yourself, and will in turn carry less emotional issues as you deal with them as you feel them. Meditating also ensures that you live in the present, which is the best place to be. Most people are triggered back into their past everyday due to picking up on anchors around them e.g. A song plays on the radio and it is your wedding song. Initially you feel happy and then, you realise you got divorced two years ago, and you feel sad and maybe angry! If you suffer from anxiety, this is fear of the future. Meditating allows you to focus on the ‘here and now’.

When should I meditate?

The best time to meditate is the 30 minutes before you go to bed and the 30 minutes as you wake up as your brain is more receptive. That said, if you really can’t do it at this time because of family pressures, work commitments, etc, just make sure you take 10-15 minutes per day to switch off and meditate.

Want to learn more?

To learn more about how to be abundant in life and to change your attitude to money and the stresses in life, you may wish to use the Money Mindset workbook How to manifest more money into your life or come on one of my money mindset workshops/courses. If you are in debt, don’t worry. One of the workshops is free! I also teach meditation and Reiki on a 1-1 basis. Of course, if you are feeling stressed and need some spiritual guidance, I am more than happy to work with you individually to help you understand the issues you have now and to help you move forward with ease.

All information can be found at http://www.insightfulminds.co.uk or you can ring me on 07815 904848 or email liz@insightfulminds.co.uk #moneymindsetworkshops #themoneyattractionangel

 

 

Instant Feel Good

1.Sit down

2.Breathe in slowly and Breathe out Slowly ( do this a couple of times)

3.Breathe in slowly and then laugh out loud slowly (do this a couple of times)

4.Say – I am so grateful and happy to be alive to see another day.

5.Think and focus on something that makes you feel happy or my favourite “wake up I feel happy boom, boom, I feel like dancing around boom boom, and now I am dancing line no one’s watching boom, boom”

6.Smile – Just spend a few seconds smiling, and then I want you to give out a couple of big laughs (hahaha)

  1. Get your Gift of a smile box, and make use of the items as you continue to feel good and smile

See you

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 13 (Six Ways to Wellbeing)

Wheel-of-Wellbeing-Logo-copy-Square-250x293

Welcome back

Thank you so much for joining in our Sadness Diet and the journey to happier times.  In everyday life, we realise that there is a time for every purpose under heaven, their will be times when we feel sad and times when we feel happy. Today we are going to look at the Six Ways to Wellbeing “It’s about finding that thing that you enjoy doing and doing more of that, rather than forcing yourself to do something that actually you are not going to be able to do.” Tony Coggins, (DIY Happiness).

Feedback from Yesterday

I hope yesterday you were inspired to realise that you are never too old to achieve your goals

Live It Well – Six Ways to Wellbeing

A while back ago, one of the organisations that I work with in kent, The Grand, introduced  me to Live It Well. which is promoting better wellbeing for the residents of Kent and Medway. Even if you don’t live in these areas, I find the resources excellent and it is helping myself and so many other people to improve our wellbeing which can help us cope with periods of sadness.  

The Six Ways to Wellbeing are small changes you can make to your life which can make a big difference. The Six Ways to Wellbeing – connect, give, take notice, keep learning, be active and care for the planet – can lift your mood and help you to cope with life gets stressful

Brief Explanation of The Six Ways to Wellbeing

Connect… With the people around you. With family, friends, colleagues and neighbours. At home, work, school or in your local community. Think of these as the cornerstones of your life and invest time in developing them. Building these connections with support and enrich you every day.

Be Active… Go for a walk or run. Step outside. Cycle. Play a game. Garden. Dance. Exercising makes you feel good. Most importantly, discover a physical activity that you enjoy; one that suits your level of mobility and fitness..

Give… Do something nice for a friend, or a stranger. Thank someone. Smile. Volunteer your time. Join a community group. Look out, as well as in. Seeing yourself, and your happiness, linked to the wider community can be incredibly rewarding and will create connections with the people around you.

Keep Learning… Try something new. Rediscover an old interest. Sign up for that course. Take on a different responsibility at work. Fix a bike. Learn to play an instrument or how to cook your favourite food. Set a challenge you will enjoy achieving. Learning new things will make you more confident, as well as being fun to do.

Take Notice… Be curious. Catch sight of the beautiful. Remark on the unusual. Notice the changing seasons. Savour the moment, whether you are on a train, eating lunch or talking to friends. Be aware of the world around you and what you are feeling. Reflecting on your experiences will help you appreciate what matters to you.

Care.. look after your community and the world. Make small changes to your life that will reduce your energy use, recycle more, leave the car at home, use low energy light bulbs, small steps to a greener life can make a difference.

Measure your wellbeing

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Activity

Today’s task is to do some more reading on the Six Ways to Wellbeing (http://www.liveitwell.org.uk/ways-to-wellbeing/six-ways-to-wellbeing/ ) and try to put into practice some of the suggestions on a daily basis as it will truly help you on your journey towards coping with life challenges which can sometimes make us sad. My aim is for us all to try and live a happier and fulfilled life.

If you need help with any of this, just email me genny@confidentqueen.co.uk and I will try and help, encourage and support you as much as I can and if I can’t I can sign post you to organisations which can. 

 

Instant Feel Good – for moments when you need a quick pick me up to feel good

1.Sit down

2.Breathe in slowly and Breathe out Slowly ( do this a couple of times)

3.Breathe in slowly and then laugh out loud slowly (do this a couple of times)

4.Say – I am so grateful and happy to be alive to see another day.

5.Think and focus on something that makes you feel happy or my favourite “wake up I feel happy boom, boom, I feel like dancing around boom boom, and now I am dancing line no one’s watching boom, boom”

6.Smile – Just spend a few seconds smiling, and then I want you to give out a couple of big laughs (hahaha)

7.Get your Gift of a smile box, and make use of the items as you continue to feel good and smile

See you tomorrow and may the SMILE always be with you!

The 21 Days sadness diet© Day 10 (Don’t be discouraged)

discouraged

Method we will use is called “IGROWS” turn our sadness into Joy.

(Issue, Goals, Reality, Options, Willingness and Smiles

Welcome back

Thank you so much for joining in our Sadness Diet and the journey to happier times.

Feedback from Yesterday

I hope yesterday you were inspired to sit down and write down the things you are going to do to help you to smile or laugh more often. It is just amazing what a difference a smile or a good laugh can make to us.

Remember if you need help, you can email me genny@confidentqueen.co.uk

As we have completed the IGROWS model, from now on we will refer to it as a way of checking that you have completed all the activities set. You can use the IGROWS model to sort out decisions you have to make or a goal you want to achieve.

Today: How to cope with discouragement

There are times in our life when we get discouraged and feel like giving up – as I get older in life, I realise that most situation like discouragement is temporary. The other day, I was so discouraged just because of a remark someone made. I could not even sleep as I started to question the things I do and why I wanted to do them. I had to take time out to breathe, pray, meditate and speak to a good friend of mine,

Discouragement – The Signs

The following are some signs of discouragement:

  • Sleeplessness — the mind and soul is full of worry.
  • Restlessness — Absent mindedness sets in and weariness results.
  • Complacency — Loss of interest in food even though you might not have eaten for hours.
  • Negative Thoughts

How to cope with discouragement:- http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/12-things-when-get-discouraged.html

 1.Take the long view.

Discouragement generally occurs when our expectations (what we think should happen) don’t align with reality (what actually happens). If we take a longer view, and relax our expectations a little, it can really help to decrease discouragement. The reality is that most things that are worthwhile take a lot of effort and time to come to fruition. So be patient!

2.Remember, there is no such thing as failure. There is only education.

We can choose, instead of thinking of failure as bad, to think of failure as education, and therefore good. When we view it this way we realize that failure isn’t something that is bad, or something to be avoided. It is simply feedback. It is simply education. When we think this way we ease discouragement.

3. Stay true to our vision. See it again in our mind.

If we are feeling discouraged, think about our vision. Think about what we want to create in our life. See it clearly. Feel what it would feel like if the image came into reality. What would this mean for us? How would we feel. Once we see it, and feel it, we will also feel empowered and our discouragement will dissipate.

4.Stop comparing yourself to others. We’re on a unique path.

Don’t compare yourself to others. We are on a unique path. It is great to be inspired by another, but if by hearing another’s story, we feel that we are lesser, then we need to just focus on our own path..

5.Change our “rules” for being happy.

What rule do we have to be happy? What has to happen for us to feel successful? Is it in our control? If it isn’t then we might be setting ourselves up for failure. By rules I mean the set of circumstances that must be present for us to feel accomplished. For example if I have a rule that says something has to happen to feel successful, what if I don’t ever reach it? Or even worse, does it mean that I never get to feel successful until I reach it? That is a sad way to live. We have to create rules that serve us. We have to live by rules that are within our control. Here are some of my rules: I am successful when I grow and improve. I am successful when I give my very best.

6. Consider who we are spending time with.

The people who we spend the most time with might be a major contributing factor to feeling discouragement. This can be a very hard one, especially if those people are family and loved ones. We have a tendency to become who we most frequently associate with, and if we spend all our time with people who are constantly negative, and feeling sorry for themselves, we can be influenced to see life through a similar lens. So what can we do? We can’t simply cut loved ones out of our lives. So what we should do is simply expand our social network. Join a peer group that is positive. Start to surround ourselves with positive people as a balance. Over time we will start to take on their mindset and this will help with any feelings of discouragement we may have.

7. Get outside, move and breathe.

Fresh air and sunshine can have an amazing effect on our feelings. Sometimes when we are feeling down, all that we need to do is simply to go outside and breathe. Movement and exercise is also a fantastic way to feel better. Positive emotions can be generated by motion. So if we start to feel down, take some deep breathes, go outside, feel the fresh air, let the sun hit our face, go for a hike, a walk, a bike ride, a swim, a run, whatever. We will feel better if we do this.

  1. Talk to someone

When I feel discouraged, I do find comfort in talking to someone. Depending on what I am feeling discouraged about, I have various people I can talk to e.g my mum, a good friend, my mentor and when I was really discouraged a few years back, I even called the Samaritan’s helpline as I really just wanted someone who did not know me to just listen and be their for me.

  1. Help someone who needs help

This is a great way to alleviate discouragement. Go find someone who needs help, and then help them. It is really that simple. When we serve others, when we go out of our way to help other people in need, we feel better. It is impossible to be discouraged when we are giving all our efforts on behalf of another. Discouragement is a really a self-driven symptom. We are focusing on ourselves. That is why we feel bad. Something isn’t right in “our” life. However, when we stop thinking about ourselves, and when we direct our attention to another, we feel better.

 

So today, be encouraged do not be discouraged, focus on the now – may the SMILE be with you always.

Instant Feel Good

1.Sit down

2.Breathe in slowly and Breathe out Slowly ( do this a couple of times)

3.Breathe in slowly and then laugh out loud slowly (do this a couple of times)

4.Say – I am so grateful and happy to be alive to see another day.

5.Think and focus on something that makes you feel happy or my favourite “wake up I feel happy boom, boom, I feel like dancing around boom boom, and now I am dancing line no one’s watching boom, boom”

6.Smile – Just spend a few seconds smiling, and then I want you to give out a couple of big laughs (hahaha)

7;Get your Gift of a smile box, and make use of the items as you continue to feel good and smile

See you tomorrow and may the SMILE always be with you!

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