49, unemployed, indebt, lonely and fed up with life #staystrong


I met a lady called Mary aged 49, at the park, as she sat all alone looking doom and gloom. I moved next to her and said hello. She seemed in shock that I spoke to her. I could see the sadness on her face and the tears in her eyes. I sat down quietly not knowing what to say. In what seemed like ages she said to me “ Is it ok if I speak to you?” I told her yes.

She then told me that she was going to be 50 in a couple of months, but felt hopeless and worthless as her husband had committed suicide the previous year, and as a result of this, their daughter who had seen him hanging, was badly affected and was suffering from depression at the young age of 14 but her son aged 25 seemed ok as he was working and had a family of his own.

Mary said she used to have a well paid job in the city which she had to leave as she too was suffering from depression and anxiety. She was worried that now she had so much debt, no job and was not sure she could even afford to pay the mortgage on her house. Approaching 50 she felt a failure as she did not have any savings to show for the 30 years she had been working. She has no close friends as when she got married she just focussed on working and taking care of the family. Now alone she felt she was feeling overwhelmed and was feeling like giving up.


When she finished I asked her if I could give her a hug! She said yes, and we hugged without saying anything to each other and it felt good just to be their for her. Just after that her phone rang and she said she must dash as she had to collect her daughter up. We quickly exchanged numbers and agreed to be in contact.

Since then we have met for coffee and by talking and sharing experiences, she has managed to find some voluntary work and has now getting help to sort out her debts, and is just trying to take one day at a time.

Meeting Mary and developing a new friendship ahs really helped me too to assess my life, and I continue to run my coaching/training programme to help people who find themselves in Mary’s position.


For more details and to get 15 minutes consultation email





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